Time to “blow” you away with this reveal,
This Do Action wasn’t real.
Hope we didn’t take the “wind” out of your sail,
But on 1st April you’re allowed a tall tale!
New Do Action: Windbreaker
Breaking wind, farting, trumping: it has many names and can lead to your being shunned by society. Yet we all do it. But here’s the problem – each and every time you break wind you’re contributing to climate change.
Cutting out farting for two months will improve your social standing, make you feel better and make a massive dent in your carbon footprint. And we have some great solutions up our sleeves to help you out.
Why
Methane. Methane is twenty times as potent a greenhouse gas as Carbon Dioxide over the short term. Plus breaking wind was also implicated in the recent departure of Zayn Malik from the pop group One Direction.
How
There are a few tricks to cutting flatulence from your lifestyle. Firstly only wearing bamboo underwear will be the biggest contribution. The natural fibres present in Bamboo will ease that flatulence and leave you fart free.
If that doesn’t do the trick, the next thing to try is giving up any food coloured orange – that includes both carrots and orange smarties. The colouring that gives carrots their distinctive colour and is used to make orange smarties, orange is a key contributor to modern levels of breaking wind.